Entry #71, April 19, 2010
In December of 2009, I shared with you that we moved from our 3600 sf home to our current
Selling a house can have mixed emotions, especially if you're downsizing from a family home
2000 sf home. For my husband and I, it was a move that needed to happen. Between the hours commuting, the gigantic house that was hard to keep up with, and our quality of life was suffering. For my two teenage sons, it was not a wanted move. Leaving friends and getting smaller rooms was not on their agenda.
For many people getting ready to move, and downsizing to a smaller home can be a challenge. Whether it’s for financial reasons, or because a family member has passed, or moving into an assisted living facility, downsizing can be painful.
Unclutterer has a great article on ‘Saying farewell to the family home’. I found the article especially interesting because I love talking about moving, and helping families stage their homes to move. In the same breath I often realize, moving isn’t always enjoyable. For those who struggle with the concept of moving, read these tips below. I believe it will help.
If you are preparing to downsize (either yourself or for a family member), keep the following thing in mind:
- Emotions are strong during this time, even when the move is desired. Take the time to carefully sort through everything. Whomever is downsizing needs to be heavily
Take time to think about the move, let the person who is downsizing make the decisions on what goes and stays
involved in the process and have time to share stories about the items with others.
- Snap digital photographs of anything you plan to throw out, donate to charity, give away, or recycle that has an emotional connection for you or your loved one. This might be the one time you want to print the photographs and stick them in an album for easy viewing (especially if an older person who doesn’t have a computer will want to look at the pictures).
- Consider hiring a senior move manager to help with the process. Having a third party involved who isn’t emotionally tied to the situation can help significantly.
- Measure the new place and know exactly how much stuff can be moved into it. You may need to go through the “taking with me” pile multiple times to ensure that the right amount of stuff will be transported.
- If family and friends are interested in some of the personal items in the current home, only let the person or persons who are downsizing decide what pieces go to whom. Try your best not to let the person moving spaces be bullied into decisions. When financially valuable items are involved, you can contact an appraiser to provide information so the best decisions are made for the person downsizing.
For the rest of the article visit Unclutterer.
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I tell my clients that they are not downsizing; they are rightsizing. By thinking about their possessions within the framework of the future and what it holds for them we decide what to keep, toss and donate. We also acknowledge that moving is an emotional process and that it’s okay to be sad. And I use a Dr. Seuss quote: Don’t cry because something is over; smile because it happened.
Thank you Lisa. What a wonderful idea – have them focus on the positive, rather than the emotional negative. Thank you for your comments!
Goodness. I have helped a client transfer hundreds of family pictures off walls and into five scrapbooks – symbolically moving the associated memories away from the property and into the books (and decluttering/depersonalizing while doing so).
Listening. Caring.
Most of my clients choose to do the work themselves. I provide the staging plan and we set up a work plan/time line as part of the plan. Especially if there is no overwhelming time constraint (like a pending foreclosure), I encourage them to pace themselves. As in – take a break every twenty minutes and set small goals. Don’t start out expecting to pack the kitchen in an afternoon, instead celebrate when each cabinet is done.
I like the advice on your link. It is amazing how physically exhausting and emotionally draining downsizing while transitioning a home into a house can be.
Rightsizing for seniors:
Prepare for the future and do not let crisis dictate what happens to you and your belongings. Too many of us have had to make decisions for our parents or our loved ones in a crisis mode. Being proactive, being organized, being prepared, and making your wishes known is one of the greatest legacies a person can leave to their family.
Thank you Sally, for making the points about preparation and being organized! It takes a lot of stress off later!